Can't Hold My Tears - S01 E29

3 years ago

Can't Hold My Tears - S01 E29

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 29

I raised my amused brows at him. “So you can really be worried about me now Corper? It is funny right? Men do things to women that they would not want to happen to their own sisters. When you were mocking me and dishonoring me behind my back, you never knew you were doing those things against your own sister. Well, I am sure you would be a lesson to all men. Before you do things to women because you can, think of how you would feel if the same is done to your own sister.”

I shook my head and turned to Mr. Sinja. The police officer who just happened to be my father. “Sir, I am sure you would forgive me if I can’t call you dad now” I said and he nodded vigorously.

“Of course my dear…” he said.

“I was right in thinking that you had seen so many things in your life. I don’t know half of your story and I am sorry if I would not have enough time to learn them. You look like a good man and I am pretty sure that you would have been a very good father if you had been given a chance.” I said.

I turned to the parents I have known all my life. “Papa, mama… I know that I have overemphasized my anger towards you and I am sorry. Even though I know that Papa never really loved me and accepted me, I still am eternally grateful to you. When I was rejected and tossed into the trash like a messed up diaper, you took me, welcomed me into your home and provided shelter for me. You took care of me for years and provided for me even though you had next to nothing. I would remain grateful to you for as long as I live, and you would never stop being my parents” I hugged my dad briefly and hugged my mum who held me tightly.

“I love you my baby… I love you so much… I am sorry.” she whispered in tears.

I saw the senator and turned to him. “Sir” I bowed my head in respect. “I instantly developed respect for you the minute I saw you. I have never seen a man as principled as you are. Even though I was not in a happy marriage, I saw you as the best father-in-law. You should hate me for what I stand for in your family but then; you are here, worried about me. I respect you sir. I really hope you find happiness because you deserve it more than anyone.”

I really wanted to leave but there was one person left. I turned to Mrs. Bello. I just could not smile at her. She stood shakily, looking at me. “I hated you the instant I saw you” I began without preamble. “You were a terrible mother-in-law but as a mother, you were worse. If there is one person I never want to set my eyes on, it is you”

“Pleeeaaaase… I am sorry…” she pleaded.

“You are not my mother; I can never accept you as my mother. You rejected me then, now, I am rejecting you… You hated me, now; I hate you beyond measure… You did not want me then, now I tell you, I do not and would not have any cause to need you in my life. You have caused so many people sadness” I shook my head. “You are not worthy to be called a mother. Please don’t look for me. You won’t find me” I said and turned to face kelvin, who was standing with Tina and Tola now. “I need to leave now”

Despite the protests of those in the room, I hastily walked out of the hospital with the only people who really mattered to me. Who says blood is thicker than water?

********************

I stood with my luggage in the sitting room, waiting for Kelvin to enter. The door opened and he came inside. Immediately he saw me, his legs stopped moving and he stood still, looking at everything before him. “Where are you going to Ara?” he asked as his face grew pale.

I sighed, wondering how I was going to handle this. “I am leaving Kel, I am going away.”

He marched towards me in an instant. “What are you talking about? Where are you going?”

“Anywhere. I am going anywhere, I want to rebuild my life, on my own, putting all my garbage behind me” I was now legally divorced from Alex. All I needed was a totally new environment to begin my life from the scratch.

“B… But… but you can’t go” he lamented as his arms fisted beside him. “I won’t let you” he said on raised voice. He looked as if his life had just snapped.

This was becoming harder. I could not quite look into his eyes. It was hard to see him struggling for composure. “I have to do this Kelvin” I said as my eyes watered. “Staying here would make me fade out Kel. I have nothing but bad memories now and no matter how much I try, you have also been linked with those memories. I want to go far away, to a place where I can build new memories and forget all that has happened. You understand me Kelvin, I know you do” I held his face, forcing myself to gaze into his eyes. “I need to start all over again Kel, please don’t stop me… please” I pleaded. Of everyone in the world, I really wanted him to understand me.

“But… But…” he sighed and walked over to the window. I stood behind him, tense and confused. His muscles vibrated with tension. I just wanted him to hold me. Tell me he understand me… tell me… “I love you Amara”

I froze and swallowed as his words sank in, creating a terrible ache in my chest. Alex turned to face me. “I love you”

“Please… please don’t do this…” I murmured.

He smiled painfully and pulled me into his arms. My heat raced as kelvin kissed my forehead lingeringly. I have never stood this close to him before and the effect was scary. He lowered his head and kissed my eyes. “Kelvin” I gasped as my legs threatened to give way.

Before I could think of protesting, his mouth closed over mine. My heart threatened to break through my chest as his mouth moved from gentle to insistent. I held onto his neck as we kissed and I was alarmed, just thinking of the effect of what was going on. Kelvin stopped suddenly and gazed at me with blazing, unreadable eyes. I was pretty sure my face mirrored his. “Go” he said suddenly. “Be happy” he said and swallowed, moving away from me. He raked his fingers through his hair and exhaled audibly.

I swallowed hard, dragging in much needed air. “Kelvin…” I called questioningly, not sure I even wanted to leave anymore.

“Pleasse promise me you would be fine Ara” he asked breathlessly.

I nodded. “I would take care of myself Kelvin”

He nodded. “I would take you anywhere you want”

I shook my head. “I want to do this on my own Kelvin; you have done more than enough.” He nodded again, running his fingers through his hair again. “I would see you again, I promise. But I would have achieved my dreams by then, so you can be proud of what I have become”.

He smiled. “I would move heaven and hell to see you again honey”.

I nodded and quickly wiped the tears that slipped off my eyes. I bent to pick up my two bags. I walked to the door with my heart feeling heavier than the bags. I turned to see Kelvin standing where he was, with his hands buried deep in his trousers. “Goodbye Kelvin”

He nodded. “Take care of yourself”

I nodded and wiped at my tears again. “I will. Take care of yourself” I said. He nodded and I quickly opened the door, lifted my bags and walked out. Breaking through your walls of pain can be very difficult, but when you finally succeed, you emerge stronger and better. I go to make a better person of myself; to pursue my dreams and gain back everything life took away from me because of my mistakes. Falling down in life is expected but how you get back up is what matters. A mistake that does not kill you makes you wiser. I turned to look back at the house, knowing that Kelvin was there, probably looking at me through the window. I would achieve my goals this time; I would do it for the one person who loves me wholeheartedly – Kelvin

*The End*